Check out Obi Wan’s Jedi Academy. If the Internet had been around when I was a young’un I’d have been an even bigger nerd.
True bravery is arriving home late after a boy’s night out, being assaulted by your wife with a broom, and still having the guts to ask – “Are you cleaning, or were you flying somewhere?”
Thanks Monkee.
MSNBC – Steam eruption under way at Mount St. Helens Seismologists predicted release for several days after earthquakes
Kind of an anticlimactic fart if you ask me.
The short story: Loud and Fun! Classic Ministry!
Carol and I went to the Ministry show last night. We had a gas! There was the usual possé of whackos that we see at the metal shows we go to. I guess it’s a fairly small community so we often see the same folks from show to show. The first band, Hanzel und Gretyl, were great. Their set was extremely loud and mostly in German (which I don’t understand), but cool all the same. It was unsettling to see a creepy German dude marching around dressed up like the Kaiser with two skinny ugly chicks and a drummer who kept standing up on his kit and flipping off the crowd. They started off with a song in English called “Third Reich from the Sun”. Here’s a sample: 3rd-reich-sample.mp3 (240kb MP3). You can hear the whole thing on their website under the “interactive” section. We must buy the CD. Here’s a review of Uber Alles.
The second band was an industrial musical intitution know as My Life with the Thrill Kill Kult. In a word: sucked. I was extremely disappointed by them and after a few songs I was ready to slap the lead singer, Groovie Mann, who was stoned out of his melon, mumbling nonsense and saying things like “I don’t know where I am”. Nice. I paid a portion of $40 per tickets to watch this asshole fall all over himself. Not much better was the 200+ pound fat chick singing backup. She was squeezed into a corset she was pouring out of from all possible seams and creases. Gross. I need brainwashing to erase the memory of it. After about 3 songs I felt like a hostage in a bank hold up just waiting to be set free.
Last but surely not least was freakshow Al Jourgensen and Ministry. Holy shit! They were great. The first thing we saw was someone in a George W Bush mask flipping off the crowd. Then AL J came out and beat the tar out of George. He really wailed on the guy. They just went full throttle and didn’t stop. The band did a pile of songs from their latest offering, Houses of the Molé (which I love) and tore the place up with NWO, Just one Fix and Thieves to name a few of the ‘oldies’. The place went nuts for those. I was extremely happy with what I saw and heard for the main set and would have went away satisfied at just that.
The encore, however, went even further. A person who I didn’t recognize at first (as he was so fat) came out on stage and began ranting about Geroge W Bush attempting to reinstate the draft and working behind the scenes with the Canadian government to prevent draft dodging by changing laws ‘behind our backs’. Who was this? Why, Jello Biafra of Dead Kennedys fame of course. He has worked with Al Jourgensen on a number of projects, not the least of which was a band called Lard. We were treated to some Lard live last night with Jello on vocals. A very cool surprise.
Jello, lay off the pasta and doughnuts. It doesn’t look good on you.
We went home with smiles on our faces and ringing ears (they’re still going)…
Sometimes I do… anyway thanks to Carol and Ada for the list:
1. “I can see your point, but I still think you’re full of shit.”
2. “I don’t know what your problem is, but I’ll bet it’s hard to pronounce.”
3. “How about never? Is never good for you?”
4. “I see you’ve set aside this special time to humiliate yourself in public.”
5. “I’m really easy to get along with once you people learn to see it my way.”
6. “I’ll try being nicer if you’ll try being smarter.”
7. “I’m out of my mind, but feel free to leave a message.”
8. “I don’t work here. I’m a consultant.”
9. “It sounds like English, but I can’t understand a damn word you’re saying.”
10. “Ahhh…I see the screw-up fairy has visited us again.”
11. “I like you. You remind me of myself when I was young and stupid.”
12. “You are validating my inherent mistrust of strangers.”
13. “I have plenty of talent and vision. I just don’t give a damn.”
14. “I’m already visualizing the duct tape over your mouth.”
15. “I will always cherish the initial misconceptions I had about you.”
16. “Thank you. We’re all refreshed and challenged by your unique point of view.”
17. “The fact that no one understands you doesn’t mean you’re an artist.”
18. “Any connection between your reality and mine is purely coincidental.”
19. “What am I? Flypaper for freaks!?”
20. “I’m not being rude. You’re just insignificant.”
21. “It’s a thankless job, but I’ve got a lot of Karma to burn off.”
22. “Yes, I am an agent of Satan, but my duties are largely ceremonial.”
23. “And your cry-baby whiny-assed opinion would be…?”
24. “Do I look like a people person?”
25. “This isn’t an office. It’s Hell with fluorescent lighting.”
26. “I started out with nothing and I still have most of it left.”
27. “Sarcasm is just one more service we offer.”
28. “If I throw a stick, will you leave?”
29. “Errors have been made. Others will be blamed.”
30. “Whatever kind of look you were going for, you missed.”
31. “I’m trying to imagine you with a personality.”
32. “A cubicle is just a padded cell without a door.”
33. “Can I trade this job for what’s behind door #1?”
34. “Too many freaks, not enough circuses.”
35. “Nice perfume. Must you marinate in it?”
36. “Chaos, panic, and disorder – my work here is done.”
37. “How do I set a laser printer to stun?”
38. “I thought I wanted a career. Turns out I just wanted a salary.”
39. “Who lit the fuse on your tampon?”
40. “Oh I get it… like humour… but different!”
KIROTV.com – News – ‘Volcano Advisory’ Issued for Mount Saint Helens
Thanks to Jackson aka Dr Doom
![\"Mike](\"http://blog.mikebrowne.com/wp-content/uploads/2013/09/Mike-Browne-190px.jpg\" "\\"Mike")