Mike Browne’s Blog

CBC News: U.S. bans Canadian beef imports thanks to one case of Mad Cow Disease in Alberta. Not good for AB.

Here’s not just mad cows but Cows with Guns to cheer up all those beef farmers. The panic will be over soon.

This was forwarded to me by my co-worker Rick P.:

(By no means do I endorse or prescribe to the views expressed below. I just thought it was worth sharing – MB)

The World Health Organisation today issued a new warning against non-essential travel to the entire Western hemisphere following renewed concerns about the spread of Severe Loss of Perspective Syndrome (SLOPS).

Officials are warning travellers not to visit the UK, the US, almost all of Western Europe, and Canada, following further outbreaks of the disease, which has led to mass panic among the media, thousands of ecstatic children being kept out of school by their credulous and moronic parents, and increased profits for DIY stores as the idiot public rush to bulk-buy face masks and boiler suits.

A WHO spokesman said, “You’d be much better off going to somewhere like Thailand or China, because all you’ve got to worry about there is SARS, and let’s face it, you’re about as likely to die from that as you are to get kicked to death by a gang of zombie nuns.”

The SARS virus has now claimed a staggering 500 lives in only six months, which makes it considerably more deadly than, say, malaria, which only kills around 3000 people every single day. Malaria, however, mainly effects only darkies what speak foreign, whereas SARS has made at least one English person feel a bit iffy for a couple of days, and is therefore considered much more serious.

The spread of SLOPS has now reached pandemic proportions, with many high-level politicians seemingly affected by the disease. The rapid spread of SLOPS has been linked to the end of the war in Iraq and the need for Western leaders to give the public something to worry about. Otherwise, they might start asking uncomfortable questions about domestic issues, and that simply would not do.

Which Backstreet boy is gay?

Introducing the Turd Twister… the funniest gag gift in the world!

I know a few people who would actually use (and proudly so) this little gem. Ugh.

BBC NEWS | World | Middle East | Sesame Street breaks Iraqi POWs

It looks as if the US is interrogatin Iraqi soldiers with the use of tunes from Sesame Street and Metallica. Poor buggers are used to listening to Adhan (prayer call) and now they’re being subjected to the Godless sounds of “C is for Cookie” and “Enter Sandman“. The assault on the ears of these poor guys must be unbearable. “Allah be praised! make it stop! I’ll tell you where to buy cheap shwarma!”

Computer geeks are going one step further now. They have taken to modifying there computer cases with neon lights, see-through panels and even water fountains. Check ot a large gallery of over 5000 case mods at Overclockers Australia PC Database.

Kat T sent me this link (right click and choose “save as”) to a Quicktime movie of Belgian commercial that just about says it all. I just wanted to strangle that kid.

Peter Pan’s Home Page! I know we’ve seen him before, but shee-it, he’s still funny. Thanks to Kathleen T for the link. 🙂

Microsoft Reveals Bizarre Reason iLoo Scrapped Thanks to Blog regular, Jeice Guyver, for the clever spin on an already funny story!