Really. How Much?

I had some thoughts regarding an age old quandry.

How much wood could a woodchuck chuck if a woodchuck could chuck wood?

Seriously.

Perhaps thumb transplants would help us finally get to the bottom of this mystery. Big toes have been used to replace thumbs lost in accidents (ironically sometimes ‘chucking’ wood). However, I’m unsure of woodchucks having big toes to begin with, as I’m not versed in woodchuck-ology (or whatever the scientific term may be).

Even if they did have big toes to sacrifice, and the transplant were to be successful, they may not be able to stand properly as they were now big toe less thus lacking the balance necessary for an all out wood chucking experiment.

Regardless, forcing a big toe less woodchuck now sporting strangely fashioned thumbs to ‘chuck wood’ doesn’t seem at all ethical.

My guess is that we will never be able to answer this question to anyone’s satisfaction so I think it’s time to stop asking it. It’s just silly.